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Mr Sausage wrote:When people told me the American version of Pulse was terrible, they weren't kidding.

It can't be worse than Feardotcom can it?

dx23 wrote:

I'm sorry for being late to this, but I love the way the cat is doing that kind of sassy "yeah I'm cute and don't I know it" head tilt towards the camera. Also is Page meant to be holding the cat up, or is it really meant to look at if she has her hand somewhere manipulating it like a glove puppet? All of which is adding a Sabrina The Teenage Witch vibe to that cover.

As to the film itself I have no idea as to its quality but since seemingly every recent Canadian TV movie turns up on weekday afternoons on Channel 5 over here, I'm sure I'll get the opportunity to check it out some time soon.

If by "recent" you mean "twelve years old", then sure.

2004 is within Channel 5's TV movie remit so its not beyond the bounds of possibility (anything prior to 2002 though is more unlikely!) - I'm not sure I would pay to see it so TV is my best hope.

Please Channel 5 don't let me down on my chance to see a film that I imagine involves Ellen Page and her sassy cat hand puppet (who like Sooty doesn't have a voice of its own but whispers clues into her ear) going into seemingly haunted suburban houses to investigate decades old unsolved crimes.

(Or have I just described the plot of Miranda July's next film?)

colinr0380 wrote:I'm not sure I would pay to see it so TV is my best hope.

It's your lucky day: the whole thing is on YouTube.

Thanks for the link, although having watched some of it my hopes about the film involving a cat puppet that gets involved in paranormal investigations now lie in tatters!

And Lindsay Lohan as Pamela Anderson

That film looks hilarious.
I am curious to see how the Amazon exorcist surfers manage to destroy the great beast. Clearly Universal missed an opportunity in Jaws 5.

I sing the body Electra!

In case you're wondering, that ugly Rotten Tomatoes tag is not a sticker, but actually printed on the cover itself. Good grief.

I imagine the process here was some exec going "Quick! We just won Best Doc! Tell some kid to slap a picture of the award on the cover" and then some miserable intern trying to figure out what award everyone's talking about comes up with "Certified Fresh".

I agree that's atrocious, but honestly, how could there be a better cover for that movie?

Having a black man pointing at some chicken and making bulgy eyes isn't even anywhere close to funny; seems like they were just hard up for ways to draw attention to what looks to be just another one of those dire spoof movies. Tony Cox seems willing to appear almost anywhere a dwarf/elf/ewok/munchkin is needed, no matter how dumb it is, as long as there's a paycheck.

It's hard out there for an imp.


(sorry)

Isn't that the poster they've always used?

No, I think this is the poster they used before;

Three big issues from that Starship Troopers cover:

1. They have stuck the female leads almost in a 'hugging the hero for comfort' position, which seems rather reductive!;

2. I have my suspicions that they have just used a still of Mars from Verhoeven's Total Recall for the background and stuck a dropship on there rather than using any Klendathu location, although that might just be because of the red hue;

and the big one:

3. They seem to have photoshopped Denise Richards into a trooper armour wielding a gun, while her character in the film is a pilot!

And then someone instragramed it for Blu-ray

Looks like they were thinking a larger and more recognizable image of Lawrence Fishburne would sell more product... even though he's wearing those glasses and hat.

Clearly he is reprising his role as Cowboy Curtis.

But Death Wish 2 came before Fishburne's Playhouse stint, which means that Cowboy Curtis must have been reprising the character from Death Wish 2 (but for kids, of course).