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Posted: **Sat Feb 11, 2006 3:00 pm**

cdnchris wrote:
leech wrote:
Sweet merciful crap!! What the fuck is that!?

"Sweet merciful crap".

Almost a haiku. Absolutely magnificent.

Posted: **Sun Feb 12, 2006 12:04 pm**

These three beauties are DVDBeaver's most recent reviews:

Those eyes...

Disembodied heads and tentacled monsters. What a combo!

Is this man scared of a boot?

Posted: **Sun Feb 12, 2006 5:24 pm**

King of Kong wrote:These three beauties are DVDBeaver's most recent reviews:

Those eyes...

Ah, this must be that rare film pairing between Clive Owen and Clint Howard in drag...

Posted: **Sun Feb 12, 2006 5:51 pm**

There's something in that suit that ate the flesh off her ass...

And Benny from Law and Order knows it!

Posted: **Mon Feb 13, 2006 6:40 pm**

Another reason to hate Valentine's Day. Mark Ruffalo seem to be a recurring theme in bad DVD covers

Posted: **Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:39 am**

Would you like this letter or perhaps this Herzog film here?

Klaus Kinski is...THE AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN

Take that Bert I. Gordon

Posted: **Sat Feb 18, 2006 11:23 pm**

Well, what can I say....STRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIKE! All the covers on the following link are downright DOGS! Take a look:

http://www.dvdtimes.co.uk/content.php?contentid=60458

Posted: **Sun Feb 19, 2006 3:52 am**

Re: LEFT BEHIND box set...

Apparently when the (c)rapture comes, the elect will leave by jet plane.

Posted: **Sun Feb 19, 2006 4:59 am**

jesus the mexican boi wrote:Apparently when the (c)rapture comes, the elect will leave by jet plane.

Yeah, not quite as glamourous as a burning chariot. But will the jet plane be separated by class? That would be a mind-job: "Well, we've been saved from hell on earth, but why did God stick us in coach?"

Posted: **Sun Feb 19, 2006 5:43 am**

Jesus is my air marshall.

Not even light can escape Larry's chin.

Posted: **Sun Feb 19, 2006 5:57 pm**

Posted: **Sun Feb 19, 2006 7:44 pm**

HerrSchreck wrote:
cdnchris wrote:
leech wrote:
Sweet merciful crap!! What the fuck is that!?
"Sweet merciful crap".

Almost a haiku. Absolutely magnificent.

Maybe that's why Sony pushed back the release date to May....could they be doing a Criterion a la VIRIDIANA? Just hoping.....

Posted: **Mon Feb 20, 2006 2:07 am**

Are Gary and the boys at DVDBeaver consciously seeking DVDs with bad covers to review? Here's the latest offender:

Posted: **Mon Feb 20, 2006 5:34 am**

King of Kong wrote:Are Gary and the boys at DVDBeaver consciously seeking DVDs with bad covers to review? Here's the latest offender:

Where the hell are the towers????

Posted: **Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:58 am**

tavernier wrote:
King of Kong wrote:Are Gary and the boys at DVDBeaver consciously seeking DVDs with bad covers to review? Here's the latest offender:

Where the hell are the towers????

On the cover of September 10th, I would guess

Posted: **Mon Feb 20, 2006 2:55 pm**

Oedipax wrote:
tavernier wrote:
King of Kong wrote:Are Gary and the boys at DVDBeaver consciously seeking DVDs with bad covers to review? Here's the latest offender:

Where the hell are the towers????
On the cover of September 10th, I would guess

Posted: **Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:34 am**

That was a definite strike Annie Mall, some of the catch phrases to go along with the titles of the films are hilarious also.

For this horror film
Ring Around the Rosie........ then further down on the cover They All Fall Down.

Chasing Ghosts...... If you don't catch up to your past, it will catch up to you.

Good times.

Posted: **Sun Mar 05, 2006 1:35 am**

Another one (thanks DVDBeaver):

Posted: **Thu Mar 09, 2006 3:55 am**

Poor Paul. What is he, a squirrel? Or is he Joe Shishido now? Why is he only showing his upper teeth? And what the hell could Thomas Haden Church be reacting to? For the life of me, I can't think of a single thought to match that expression.

Hmm, sure!

He's crying milk, so that's good.

So we have balloons spraying from his ass? Judging from his expression, I'd say it hurts.

Please God, no. Tell your children this isn't funny. Surely you have a rapport with Mr. Graham? Tell him to stop, please. "Put the camera down, that is not a toy." Something like that? Thanks. Just looking at that cover brings back painful childhood memories of being forced to watch horrible Christian films in church. They all had that sort of "wacky but righteous" font for the titles. I'm so angry all of a sudden. I've got to calm down somehow.

So...since we have air bubbles coming out of Wanda's mouth...is everything below her underwater? But we have water behind our stars, that appear to be floating hundreds of feet above the water...And is Kevin Kline standing back from the rest of the cast because he won an Oscar? Snob.

Posted: **Fri Mar 10, 2006 4:16 am**

Posted: **Sat Mar 11, 2006 3:52 pm**

Dear Catastrophe Totoro wrote:[

Hmm, sure!

He's crying milk, so that's good.

Are the Fuccon's, is that supposed to be funny? May be result of some terrible terrible drug sickness on my part but looks like a random shot of pedestrians snatched from my eyesight..

Posted: **Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:45 pm**

WHAT in the name of ALL that is holy are The Fuccons??! I'm going to have nightmares about that woman with the huge lips and mono-chromed skin.

Posted: **Sun Mar 12, 2006 12:26 am**

It's a Japanese TV series about a family of American mannequins who move to Japan. It's apparently meant to be a parody of unfunny American family sitcoms and it is indeed quite successful at being unfunny. It's probably better known as Oh Mikey! but ADV couldn't pass up the chance to make 10,000 identical puns on the word "Fuccon."

Posted: **Sun Mar 12, 2006 2:13 am**

Penny Dreadful wrote:WHAT in the name of ALL that is holy are The Fuccons??! I'm going to have nightmares about that woman with the huge lips and mono-chromed skin.

Although The Fanciful Norwegian has already pretty well surmised Oh Mikey, the following reviews do give a great indication of the series' eccentric humour: One, two, three, and four.

Posted: **Sun Mar 12, 2006 5:31 am**

And no wholesale smuggling of the Fokkers (or however they spelled it) spiel in that one...

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Worst DVD covers... ever!