Worst DVD covers... ever!

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Cinéslob · #676 Post by **Cinéslob** » Sat Sep 30, 2006 12:58 pm

jesus the mexican boi wrote:We are in serious trouble if SS is humanity's greatest hope.

Oh, I don't know; he at least has a sense of humour.

HerrSchreck · #677 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Sat Sep 30, 2006 2:30 pm

Multi-Region wrote:- AFFAIR IN TRINIDAD... why a grey-skin Rita Hayworth (and a "huge" Glenn Ford)?

Because Glenn Ford has a huge schlong pointed up at him under his chin, and Rita is lifting her dress to jump on for a ride. Look carefully, and follow faint midline of Ford's shirt on it's way down... the Persuaders in action.

A "huge" Glenn Ford indeed. This is going to start a Dave Hare rental frenzy.

colinr0380 · #678 Post by **colinr0380** » Sat Sep 30, 2006 3:28 pm

The Rorschach Test

HerrSchreck · #679 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Sat Sep 30, 2006 3:55 pm

Believe me I expected that, wise-guy! It was inevitable in fact.

Of course, your viewing the pic, and, with the evidence in front of you, choosing instead to see me as... guess that means you're uh *ahem* ( =; that's about enough of that).

Cinesimilitude · #680 Post by **Cinesimilitude** » Sat Sep 30, 2006 4:25 pm

Cinéslob wrote:
jesus the mexican boi wrote:We are in serious trouble if SS is humanity's greatest hope.
Oh, I don't know; he at least has a sense of humour.

seagall's best work is in his commercials nowadays, thats for sure.

dx23 · #681 Post by **dx23** » Mon Oct 02, 2006 11:39 pm

They don't seem to even fit in the cover.

richast2 · #682 Post by **richast2** » Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:18 am

so wait, she's mozart, and he's the whale? she's josh hartnett? I'm really confused.

King of Kong · #683 Post by **King of Kong** » Sat Oct 07, 2006 8:01 am

This one looks a bit, I dunno, cheap:

HerrSchreck · #684 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Sat Oct 07, 2006 12:39 pm

New to uh Ford, friend?

Here's a guy who clearly never owned THE SEARCHERS on video before. That's only been debatably the most important dvd release of a western for the past nine years... and now that WB has scotched the color on the new SE, probably, increasingly, the most sought after as they become more scarce.

The disc is from 1997. And the cover is the same as the VHS what preceded it.

colinr0380 · #685 Post by **colinr0380** » Sat Oct 07, 2006 3:06 pm

King of Kong wrote:This one looks a bit, I dunno, cheap

"I've found him! In the sky! Let me try to shoot him this time, pa!"

(Sorry, couldn't resist!)

Lemmy Caution · #686 Post by **Lemmy Caution** » Sat Oct 07, 2006 4:14 pm

It's actually a profound elegy, with the atomic bomb test in the background sending John Wayne's spirit into the sky.
(and he died with a hat on).

Or else it's just a cheapo design.

Faux Hulot · #687 Post by **Faux Hulot** » Sun Oct 08, 2006 2:40 am

Lemmy Caution wrote:It's actually a profound elegy, with the atomic bomb test in the background sending John Wayne's spirit into the sky.

Either that or the Duke is riding away from the set of The Conqueror.

Lemmy Caution · #688 Post by **Lemmy Caution** » Wed Oct 11, 2006 12:46 pm

Generally I don't think horror and cheapo films can really qualify for worst covers, as often they aren't trying to have nice artistic covers anyway. And if they have bad covers, it makes it that much easier to skip, when the cover matches the content and both are bad.
But, check out this abomination:

Particularly noteworthy is how the director's credit appears printed inside a white stain.

[Hmm...size matters. How do you get those big jpg's]

King Crimson · #689 Post by **King Crimson** » Wed Oct 11, 2006 5:06 pm

Hey, that's Troma. It's acceptable.

Anyways:

#690 Post by **Matt** » Wed Oct 11, 2006 5:11 pm

If only the crosshairs were right between Tara Reid's vacant, dead eyes.

dx23 · #691 Post by **dx23** » Fri Oct 13, 2006 4:00 pm

tryavna · #692 Post by **tryavna** » Fri Oct 13, 2006 4:02 pm

Would you really expect anything different from a home-instruction video?

dx23 · #693 Post by **dx23** » Fri Oct 13, 2006 4:05 pm

The banjo alone would have been enough.

#694 Post by **Matt** » Fri Oct 13, 2006 4:05 pm

tryavna wrote:Would you really expect anything different from a home-instruction video?

He could be playing it, instead of gripping it in what looks to be an inadvertant demonstration of his masturbation technique.

tryavna · #695 Post by **tryavna** » Fri Oct 13, 2006 4:06 pm

dx23 wrote:The banjo alone would have been enough.

I don't know.... If I were a good enough musician to be able to teach by video, I'd probably plaster my pudgy face on the cover, too.

manicsounds · #696 Post by **manicsounds** » Sat Oct 14, 2006 11:18 pm

jorencain · #697 Post by **jorencain** » Sun Oct 15, 2006 12:16 am

Those are the best ever. Thanks for posting that!

Who knew that there was a whole SERIES of female ejaculation instructional videos?!?!?!

colinr0380 · #698 Post by **colinr0380** » Sun Oct 15, 2006 1:12 am

jorencain wrote:Who knew that there was a whole SERIES of female ejaculation instructional videos?!?!?!

I'm sure they probably have another series about discovering the difference between your arse and your elbow. Perhaps that could run to a couple of videos - volume 1 "Introducing the derriere"; volume 2 "A Brief History of the elbow and its functions"; volume 3 "comparative analysis"

Also why do they list two doctors and then Baja. Who, or what, is Baja?

'Remembering' how to drum?! Is there really that much to forget about drumming? I'm sure even Koko the gorilla knows how to do that.

Would you trust anyone with the nickname 'breaker' to teach you how to dance? It sounds like he might be a danger to household ornaments when he twirls his legs around in the air like that. Perhaps that is the reason for the warning at the bottom of the cover. Either that or it is a warning that breakdancing causes explosive mushroom cloud flatulence.

miless · #699 Post by **miless** » Sun Oct 15, 2006 1:45 am

colinr0380 wrote: Also why do they list two doctors and then Baja. Who, or what, is Baja?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baja

dx23 · #700 Post by **dx23** » Sun Oct 15, 2006 3:34 am

Since we have now this instructional video theme:

The 3 on top have as much street cred as Barbara Walters:

Those guys at Homespun video love their banjos and masturbation:

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Worst DVD covers... ever!