criterionforum.org

Jack Black to star in an adaptation of Gulliver's Travels. If Ted Danson can do it, anybody can, right?

Just what we've been waiting for: a Steven Spielberg/Will Smith remake of Oldboy.

Antoine Doinel wrote:Just what we've been waiting for: a Steven Spielberg/Will Smith remake of Oldboy.

Yeah, that's going to work. Why don't they add Mike Myers and Jessica Alba as well?

Teaser poster for John Carpenter's new film.

Sideways gets a Japanese remake. I heard that in this version, when a character drinks a merlot, they grow fifteen arms and the universe closes in on itself.

Antoine Doinel wrote:Just what we've been waiting for: a Steven Spielberg/Will Smith remake of Oldboy.

I fucking hate Spielberg, watch this become Will Smith trying to save his really hot girlfriend from a kidnapper after being locked up.

Hayden Christensen is going to star in a remake of Mona Lisa set in New York City and will be directed by Larry Clark.

Fletch F. Fletch wrote:Hayden Christensen is going to star in a remake of Mona Lisa set in New York City and will be directed by Larry Clark.

](*,) Ahhhhhhh! It never ends!

Antoine Doinel wrote:Just what we've been waiting for: a Steven Spielberg/Will Smith remake of Oldboy.

I hope when Will Smith flips through the photo album, he says "Aw hell no!"

I like Spielberg a lot, which is why it's disappointing to see him waste his time on garbage like Tin Tin and remaking Old Boy. Get to the Abraham Lincoln film. A president that declared martial law, suspended habeas corpus, demanded to force his laws onto other states... and he's viewed as the good guy. It could be really interesting.

Oh well, as for Old Boy, Variety doesn't actually say he's helming it. Just "collaborating" with Will Smith. Maybe it's a producer credit and he'll pass it off to one of the lesser directors he hangs around with like Michael Bay or Peter Jackson.

I agree about the Lincoln film, Liam Neeson would make an awesome Abraham.

Grand Illusion wrote:I like Spielberg a lot, which is why it's disappointing to see him waste his time on garbage like Tin Tin and remaking Old Boy. Get to the Abraham Lincoln film. A president that declared martial law, suspended habeas corpus, demanded to force his laws onto other states... and he's viewed as the good guy. It could be really interesting.

Oh well, as for Old Boy, Variety doesn't actually say he's helming it. Just "collaborating" with Will Smith. Maybe it's a producer credit and he'll pass it off to one of the lesser directors he hangs around with like Michael Bay or Peter Jackson.

How can you even attempt to remake Oldboy with Will Smith, black people don't eat gyoza...

RE: Spielberg/Smith Oldboy remake

Actually, I've looked forward to an American remake of Oldboy since I first saw the original precisely because I think it could be a very powerful film if (and only if) a very mainstream and popular actor stars and agrees to go through with the original ending. Smith fits that mold, but almost certainly will change the ending. If you ask me, the ideal remake would be directed by David Cronenberg and star Tom Hanks.

Grand Illusion wrote:Get to the Abraham Lincoln film. A president that declared martial law, suspended habeas corpus, demanded to force his laws onto other states... and he's viewed as the good guy. It could be really interesting.

Is that why they call it the war of northern aggression then?

Highway 61 wrote:RE: Spielberg/Smith Oldboy remake

Actually, I've looked forward to an American remake of Oldboy since I first saw the original precisely because I think it could be a very powerful film if (and only if) a very mainstream and popular actor stars and agrees to go through with the original ending. Smith fits that mold, but almost certainly will change the ending. If you ask me, the ideal remake would be directed by David Cronenberg and star Tom Hanks.

Cronenberg would be amazing if he didn't stick with the formula he used for "Eastern Promises". Maybe throw a little Videodrome into the mix. But Tom Hanks? I just don't see a lanky-looking guy as the lead. If I had to choose, I would pick a raggedy Hugh Jackman.

exte wrote:

Grand Illusion wrote:Get to the Abraham Lincoln film. A president that declared martial law, suspended habeas corpus, demanded to force his laws onto other states... and he's viewed as the good guy. It could be really interesting.

Is that why they call it the war of northern aggression then?

Pretty much. That name for the Civil War is used with the belief that the Southern states had the right to their own sovereignty and could legally secede. Obviously slavery is a crime against humanity, so the ends justified the means, but secession is a really interesting subject that hasn't been played out in film much, if at all.

As recently as the November elections, Sarah Palin was being attacked for being tangentially linked to party that favored Alaskan secession. And with Chechnya, Tibet, and Israel/Palestine always in the news, sovereignty is still a hot topic. That's why it's such a disappointment to me when Spielberg, who made the excellent Munich, wants to make a Hollywood remake of a perfectly fine (and recent) original.

Park Chan-wook should make a film about Lincoln to get him back. I'm a Cyborg President But That's Okay.

Apparently, some idiots have decided to do a remake of the Karate Kid with Will Smith's fucking son!!

Someone ought to make a horror movie out of this thread.

Grand Illusion wrote:Park Chan-wook should make a film about Lincoln to get him back. I'm a Cyborg President But That's Okay.

It could star the animatronic Lincoln from Disney World's Hall of Presidents.

=D>

Unbelievably, this project returns to our attention again.

Ridley Scott, who has been attached as a producer on "Monopoly" and has been mentioned as a possible director, is now officially attached to helm the project, with an eye toward giving it a futuristic sheen along the lines of his iconic "Blade Runner."

Uh......words fail me.

So now there's going to be a new wave of movies based on board games? With a dystopian future Planet of the Apes-style adaptation of...Hungry Hungry Hippos?

Nothing can beat Clue.

If it expects to fully capture the spirit of a good rousing game of Monopoly, this movie had better be at least 5 hours long.

swo17 wrote:If it expects to fully capture the spirit of a good rousing game of Monopoly, this movie had better be at least 5 hours long.

The last two hours of which should just be the characters calling the audience names.