Beowulf (Robert Zemeckis, 2007)

[Magic Hate Ball]

Saw this in IMAX 3D. Some of the effects were unpleasant and made me go cross-eyed. The issue is that everything's in focus, including the parts sticking out at you and the parts wayyy in the distance, so it kind of hurts to look at sometimes. Some really terrific jump scares, and to be honest, I haven't been as thrilled by a movie than I was by this in a long time. The dragon fight was amazing.

Roger Ebert must have some interesting things to say about the rating.

[malcolm1980]

Didn't like this one. Save for Crispin Glover's interesting performance and Angelina Jolie's boobies.

It's Zemeckis's worst movie.

[colinr0380]

Glad to see 300 is having an influence.

Shit, the next few years better not be like the five years following The Matrix.

Or the five years following Pulp Fiction.

Or the five years following Star Wars.

The list goes on....

Hollywood is so predictable.

I don't think 300 could seriously have had that effect - I think this is a merging, which 300 was also part of, of the five years following the last of the Lord of the Rings films and the decade following the use of CG in Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within!

[tavernier]

Where the hell is Barmy when we need him???

[Svevan]

This thread needs more hate; let's get back to discussing Beowulf.

[portnoy]

Guys, if you aren't seeing this, then holy shit you're missing out on the funniest movie of the year. This thing bring Ed Wood/Coleman Francis style laughs in a huge way, as in one extended sequence where a series of objects have to be strategically placed in order to prevent Beowulf's dick from showing. John Malkovich delivers an inconceivable vocal performance with line readings that Christopher Walken would dismiss as too mannered.

And don't even get me started on the fucking sea-monsters - oh my God I've never laughed so much in all my life. Just the most insanely childish bullshit imaginable. The movie tries to shoehorn in some thematic stuff about mythmaking, but the treatment is so hamfisted that it's nearly as laughable as everything else.

Oh - and I get that it's a fantasy and there are dragons and shit, but there's a shocking, hilarious amount of blood and gore in this movie, given that it's PG-13.

Still, I used this trip to the theater to also sneak into The Darjeeling Limited - I'd rather watch Beowulf five or six times than sit through Darjeeling again.

[Noir of the Night]

I for one am counting the days until we get motion capture The Corrections, in 3D!!!

[malcolm1980]

I for one am counting the days until we get motion capture The Corrections, in 3D!!!

The talking shit sequence would be a blast to see on 3D.

[Noir of the Night]

Man, I forgot about that part, I really should reread that book.

[noelbotevera]

Best thing in the film is Gaiman's trying to tie bits and pieces of the legend together for a more Freudian interpretation; it works for what it is, but it's really a diminishment of the original's themes.

Otherwise, not impressed. CGI allows the guy to do the impossible and he promptly goes for a shitload of CGI cliches.

For the record, I liked the Back movies, liked Castaway okay (mainly for Hanks, loathed the finale), liked Used Cars, Wanna Hold Your Hand, his script for 1941 and Death Becomes Her very much, hated that Gump movie (Winston Groom's original novel is a much better picaresque). I love Contact, but for all the wrong reasons--it's so embarrassingly bad I enjoy watching it drunk.

[domino harvey]

Beowulf though looks like garbage, just as Polar Express did. The human face is so complex that anything less than perfect imitation, if it exists, unleashes absurdity.

How quickly we've all forgotten the grim prophecies of

[Jeff]

Random Zemeckis discussion moved here.

[patrick]

I went to see with with my dad yesterday and I enjoyed it, although I'm guessing most of that might be because of how awesome the 3D is. It seemed like Gaiman tried to smarten the script up a bit (which I appreciated) although in the end it didn't make much of a difference. It's way too long and the second half (the part that diverges the most from the original tale) drags a lot, although again I feel like the screenwriters did a fairly admirable job of adapting a story that probably wouldn't play well on screen if translated too faithfully. It's not a great film by any stretch of the imagination, but it's still a million times better than 300, simply because there's a nudge-nudge wink-wink sensibility to the whole thing - the reason that the second act dragged on for me was that it has the same absurdly serious tone as 300.

I agree about being kind of shocked that this got away with a PG-13, even if Angelina Jolie is as anatomically correct as a Barbie doll (and has fucking stiletto heels coming out of her feet - I'm guessing that had to be Roger Avary at work) there was still enough CGI violence and ribald humor than I can ever remember seeing in a PG-13 movie.