'Rediculous' Customer & Critic Reviews

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davebert
Joined: Fri May 05, 2006 8:00 pm
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#876 Post by davebert »

I like the required dropping of the book's list price (and still a bargain for Canadians...)
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MichaelB
Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2006 10:20 pm
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#877 Post by MichaelB »

I don't even need to name the film...
mexan-1 (IMDB) wrote:Oh my God!

I watched this movie a few days ago and I think this is the worth movie I've ever seen. I can't believe that someone gave a 10 to this S*it! Awful! And I can't believe that only 883 people gave 1. In my opinion everyone have to give a 1 to this film. Here is my list about the movie:

Actors: Not bad! 10/7

Story: Play chess with the death?? I'm notstupid 10/3

The best scene of the film: the end credits--I was so happy

when it's ended.

I hope that I will never again see a movie (Is that a movie? I think that's more like s*it)like this. And finally here is a little joke for you: -Where do horses live? -In neigh-borhoods
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sonofkinski
Joined: Fri Jul 25, 2008 11:37 pm
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#878 Post by sonofkinski »

MichaelB wrote:I don't even need to name the film...
Someone typed that.
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swo17
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#879 Post by swo17 »

MichaelB wrote:I don't even need to name the film...
Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey?
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Steven H
Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2004 7:30 pm
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#880 Post by Steven H »

MichaelB wrote:I don't even need to name the film...
I love the worst/worth typo. Makes it sound like he lisped it.
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fiddlesticks
Joined: Fri Sep 21, 2007 12:19 am
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#881 Post by fiddlesticks »

S/he may have hated it, but it appears to have had its impact. I can't imagine a more Antonius Block-like opening than "Oh my God!"
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Jonny Pasadena
Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 9:42 pm

#882 Post by Jonny Pasadena »

mexan-1 (IMDB) wrote:Story: Play chess with the death?? I'm notstupid 10/3
It's like Steve Guttenberg says in Diner -- "I've been to Atlantic City a hundred times, I've never seen Death playing chess on the beach."
Napoleon
Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 10:55 am

#883 Post by Napoleon »

Judging by his little joke at the end he's about 18 months old. No wonder he struggled to get to grips with SS. Wonder what he'd make of The Silence.

Here is another guess the film (especially for MK):
Some genius on Amazon uk wrote:This is the biggest pile of tosh you are ever likely to see. A mate mentioned it was a good movie another mate popped up and said whatever you do don't watch it. I listened to mate A and I can't believe I bought this on blu-ray. Imagine a giant killer cat fish on the loose in a city, after being genetically modified after chemicals are dumped in the sewer. Ohh its Korean as well not that I hold that against it but I just had the impression all the way through that they had taken one of those old Godzilla B&W movies and remade it, except where the hell was godzilla. DO NOT. REPEAT DO NOT BUY, WATCH OR EVEN CONSIDER THIS MOVIE. And don't do what I did and listen to the mate that said it was good.
I can feel the pain of 'mate A' who recommended it to him.
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MichaelB
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#884 Post by MichaelB »

Napoleon wrote:Judging by his little joke at the end he's about 18 months old. No wonder he struggled to get to grips with SS. Wonder what he'd make of The Silence.
Well, this is what Chris Bagley thought of it:
Chris Bagley wrote:I don't think anything at all happened in this movie. As far as I can tell, it's just a window into the lives of three very boring people. Like several other viewers, I felt simply uncomfortable while watching this--first because it's a disturbing movie, but more importantly because I actually had better things to do with my 95 minutes.
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Michael Kerpan
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#885 Post by Michael Kerpan »

Napoleon wrote:Here is another guess the film (especially for MK):
Some genius on Amazon uk wrote:This is the biggest pile of tosh you are ever likely to see. A mate mentioned it was a good movie another mate popped up and said whatever you do don't watch it. I listened to mate A and I can't believe I bought this on blu-ray. Imagine a giant killer cat fish on the loose in a city, after being genetically modified after chemicals are dumped in the sewer. Ohh its Korean as well not that I hold that against it but I just had the impression all the way through that they had taken one of those old Godzilla B&W movies and remade it, except where the hell was godzilla. DO NOT. REPEAT DO NOT BUY, WATCH OR EVEN CONSIDER THIS MOVIE. And don't do what I did and listen to the mate that said it was good.
I can feel the pain of 'mate A' who recommended it to him.
Poor BONG Joon-ho.

Poor friend who has better taste in movies than in his buddies.
Napoleon
Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 10:55 am

#886 Post by Napoleon »

Nosferatu (for HS).

[quote=""real metal listener""]I know it was filmed over 80 years ago, but this is pure and utter bore! How on earth can people say this is the best scary movie ever made and briliantly filmed and acted i dont know!
Firstly, the picture quality is astonishingly bad! You'd think that with all the new technology available today that someone could make the picture atleast bareable, yet instead it practically hurts to look at.
The caharcters can NOT ACT! its worse then a 5 year olds christmad concert at school, the movements are corny and its all sooooooooooooooooooooooooo terrible!
I know you'll read this review and decide to buy it anyway because the overall rating is 5 stas, but trust....its way over-hyped. [/quote]
C'mon Nick!! Sort out the goddamn picture quality!
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LQ
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#887 Post by LQ »

what was the most irritating, paging through the more choice reviews, was how many people said that because of The Host, they now renounce/hate/etc japanese movies.
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Michael Kerpan
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#888 Post by Michael Kerpan »

LQ wrote:what was the most irritating, paging through the more choice reviews, was how many people said that because of The Host, they now renounce/hate/etc japanese movies.
Lucky for the Korean film industry, however.

;~}
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Steven H
Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2004 7:30 pm
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#889 Post by Steven H »

Napoleon wrote:Nosferatu (for HS).

[quote=""real metal listener""]I know it was filmed over 80 years ago, but this is pure and utter bore! How on earth can people say this is the best scary movie ever made and briliantly filmed and acted i dont know!
Firstly, the picture quality is astonishingly bad! You'd think that with all the new technology available today that someone could make the picture atleast bareable, yet instead it practically hurts to look at.
The caharcters can NOT ACT! its worse then a 5 year olds christmad concert at school, the movements are corny and its all sooooooooooooooooooooooooo terrible!
I know you'll read this review and decide to buy it anyway because the overall rating is 5 stas, but trust....its way over-hyped.
C'mon Nick!! Sort out the goddamn picture quality![/quote]
A good ol fashioned school Christmad Concert you say? Starring five year olds? I would pay all kinds of money to see something like that. Christ mad!
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MichaelB
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#890 Post by MichaelB »

DVD File strikes (out) again:
Kenneth J. Souza wrote:The movie also effectively skewers our own growing obsession with criminals – something that has only escalated even more since the film was released theatrically in 1994. There are references to Ted Bundy, Son of Sam, and Charles Manson sprinkled throughout; and although he isn’t mentioned by name, Beverly Sutphin’s eventual criminal trial owes a lot to the O.J. Simpson brouhaha which everyone watched live on TV. This being a John Waters film, it is also steeped in satire and dark humor; although the tone may seem a bit over the top for audiences not used to his style, Serial Mom remains his most accessible work to date.
Since Serial Mom opened two months before O.J. Simpson was even arrested, let alone tried, is he complaining that Waters isn't psychic?
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swo17
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#891 Post by swo17 »

So, apparently Criterion shouldn't have bothered to put out Vampyr:
Netflix user WiLL wrote:PB 1533558, I don?t think you can count on this website to carry every new special version of a film. The ?thick black bar? is there because it covers up the original foreign dialogue. That must mean the print they had or the best print available had subtitles printed onto it. BTW, Criterion isn't all that and I dig trashy looking movie prints. roukouko, if you did your research you?d know that the film is supposed to look washed out. It comes from exposing the film to light. For me the acting was pretty poor and story very slow moving. That's why I can only award it two lonely stars. Just because a film's old doesn't mean it's great or masterful.
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MichaelB
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#892 Post by MichaelB »

How could Dreyer have been so careless as to expose the film to light!

If only he'd taken a leaf out of João César Monteiro's book...

A glorious review of Distant Voices Still Lives on Amazon:
S. MacGregor 'Macaroni' (Scotland) wrote:5 star reviews for this, I completely disagree.

Too many sing-a-longs! I was fed up listening to them. Didnt see the point in the movie, other than a sing-a-long. Looked like a play on screen, not one I would recommend. Drab drab drab.
S. MacGregor 'Macaroni's only other review is of Apocalypto:
Well structured movie and beautiful despite the violence. It did make me cringe at times, but at the same time I could not stop watching it. One I would watch again. It was also very interesting watching the extra features about the making of the movie. Fascinating.
Indeed.
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life_boy
Joined: Sat Apr 15, 2006 3:51 am
Location: Mississippi

#893 Post by life_boy »

Joe-290 has some real gems over on imdb. Very quotable.
Joe-290 wrote:Leaving Las Vegas (1995)
the most realistic movie ever

Now, this movie is the most relaistic movie ever. There is many relaistic films such as 'The Field' and 'in the name of the father' but this is one of the best. Everything in it is so true. All sadness and depressing but portraying real life. It is the true art of film, no happy ending. People can forget their Star Wars because this is what real film is about. The soundtrack is also very well done. Nicholas Cage, not one of my favourite actors does a magnificent job in this film as an alcoholic who goes to Las Vegas after losing his job and wife to drink himself to death. The title is good as well as he goes to Las Vegas to leave it. What an amazing movie. This is one to watch but I should let you know, its all sadness and heart ache and depresion - what life really is.

Passenger 57
An amateur of an amateur

This film was full of amateur except for some ok acting from Wesley Snipes. The script was very brief and didnt have much interesting ot captivating. It was a total amateur made script piece. The directions were not too bad but not intirely great. I would like to watch this movie a Wednesday morning fro no particular reason I just would. It was a nice little action movie to go along with a nice little house and a nice little flower garden. I would not reccoment this film but it is a lot better than Star Wars.


This Is Elvis (1981)
THE BEST DOCUMENTARY OF THE 20TH CENTURY!!!!

This has to be the best documentary of the 20th century because it gives a detailed description of the man who started rock 'n' roll and made it the most popular form of music in history. Since music and mainly rock 'n' roll music is the most popular form of entertainment, this is an important movie to show people the first and last person in rock who knew the real meaning of music ( and thats all forms of music). The film goes through the years and stages of Elvis and shows how he fell apart in the seventies and how he died of sadness, loneliness and total depression. It shows the greatest performances of Elvis. Clips from his movies and concerts and rare footage taken during his life. The film is quite sad and will bring a tear to your eye by the way it is made showing the truth on the sadness Elvis lived after his break up with his wife Priscilla. It will make people look at life differently and see tragedy in the life of someone so nice, kind and generous. Someone so human and gentle and the man who was probably the only person in rock 'n' roll to have great faith and love in God.
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fiddlesticks
Joined: Fri Sep 21, 2007 12:19 am
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#894 Post by fiddlesticks »

He forgot to compare This is Elvis to Star Wars, so the review is of no use to me.
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Matt
Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2004 4:58 pm

#895 Post by Matt »

Here is a scintillating review of Misha Glenny's McMafia, a 400-page book on how globalization has created unprecedented opportunities for organized crime.
Ray Points wrote:The book was ok.Its actually alot of short story type chapters.Different criminals around the world.
And for what other books has Mr. Points written reviews? Mengele: The Complete Story and Doctor Goebbels: His Life & Death. And what's on his Amazon Wish List? Ozzy Unauthorized, Ozzy Osbourne: Diary of a Madman, and Ozzy Osbourne: The Story of the Ozzy Osbourne Band.
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swo17
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#896 Post by swo17 »

Netflix user DREAMER wrote:Sarah's Child
3 stars

I LIKED THIS MOVIE QUITE ALOT THE STORY LINE WAS INTERESTING AND THE FILM QUALITY WASNT TO BAD THE ACTING WASNT AWEFUL. THE LITTLE GIRL WAS EVEN EEERY LOOKING. it WAS QUITE PREDICTABLE BUT WHAT MOVIE OF THIS GENRE ISNT. ALL IN ALL IT WAS A GOOD WATCH IF YOUR NOT A TRIPLE A RATED HOLLYWOOD MOVIE SNOB THAT IS.
I especially like the artistic choice to not capitalize the word 'it'.
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exte
Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 8:27 pm
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#897 Post by exte »

swo17 wrote:
Netflix user DREAMER wrote:Sarah's Child
3 stars

I LIKED THIS MOVIE QUITE ALOT THE STORY LINE WAS INTERESTING AND THE FILM QUALITY WASNT TO BAD THE ACTING WASNT AWEFUL. THE LITTLE GIRL WAS EVEN EEERY LOOKING. it WAS QUITE PREDICTABLE BUT WHAT MOVIE OF THIS GENRE ISNT. ALL IN ALL IT WAS A GOOD WATCH IF YOUR NOT A TRIPLE A RATED HOLLYWOOD MOVIE SNOB THAT IS.
I especially like the artistic choice to not capitalize the word 'it'.
This thread does have its moments...
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davebert
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#898 Post by davebert »

swo17 wrote:
Netflix user DREAMER wrote:Sarah's Child
3 stars

IF YOUR NOT A TRIPLE A RATED HOLLYWOOD MOVIE SNOB THAT IS.
Oh good lord. #-o
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nyasa
Joined: Thu Mar 10, 2005 9:05 am
Location: UK

#899 Post by nyasa »

Matt wrote:Here is a scintillating review of Misha Glenny's McMafia, a 400-page book on how globalization has created unprecedented opportunities for organized crime.
Ray Points wrote:The book was ok.Its actually alot of short story type chapters.Different criminals around the world.
And for what other books has Mr. Points written reviews? Mengele: The Complete Story and Doctor Goebbels: His Life & Death. And what's on his Amazon Wish List? Ozzy Unauthorized, Ozzy Osbourne: Diary of a Madman, and Ozzy Osbourne: The Story of the Ozzy Osbourne Band.
The Mengele review is an absolute gem. Ok, so the infamous Nazi doctor was evil personified - but he was lonely.
Ray Points wrote:Excellent book.Couldn't put it down.A touchy subject that most won't write about but if no one does then we will never learn from our past.The author tackles the subject of his life,evils and in the end his loneliness.
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TheDoman
Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 10:19 am

#900 Post by TheDoman »

Whilst its not a stupid comment, it had me cracking up. About A Nos Amours from DVDVerdict:
Steve Evans wrote:For the utterly prurient curiosity seeker with bare bosoms on the mind, Bonnaire was a very beautiful young woman who graces the screen often with her nude body. She was barely 16 years old when the picture was made. But chances are, the raincoat crowd won't pony up $40 to see a naked teenager in an obscure French arthouse film. Perhaps they should. This is the cinematic equivalent of a free lunch before the preacher's sermon.
=D> :lol: Cracking stuff.
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