Worst DVD Covers...ever! (Part 3-D)

[domino harvey]

Groooooooss, the cross is sewn into his chest. This is why I don't play video games. Well, this and because they're retarded

[Mr Sausage]

Groooooooss, the cross is sewn into his chest. This is why I don't play video games. Well, this and because they're retarded

Seems rather appropriate for a book that's one long catalogue of torture methods.

[domino harvey]

Can't wait for The 120 Levels of Sodom

[knives]

And comedy, don't forget the comedy. Truly Dante found timeless humour in having a pope talk out of his ass.

[Lemmy Caution]

That Dante's Inferno for gameboys marketing is great.
Reminds me of this history site, http://www.badassoftheweek.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; , which provides a video gamer take on assorted famous people of the past.

An example:

Amazing, heart-warming stories about the triumph of the human spirit through the medium of homemade artillery are cool and all, but every once in a while you need to sit down and sink your teeth into a straight-up, no-bullshit medieval ass-annihilator who responded to dissenters with a crushing mace-wound to the balls, clawed together an empire by punching people in half with a steel-plated gauntlet, and enjoyed drinking lager amid giant steaming piles of broke-to-fuck corpses. Frederick Barbarossa is one of those men.

Barbarossa was one of the most stone-cold shit-wreckers of the 12th century, which is saying something because (as you all know) the 12th century was a pretty prime time in history for stone-cold shit-wreckers. He was born in the year 1122 to a family that claimed lineage to fellow-badass Charlemagne, and was intent on upholding the legacy of endless beatings and military ball-crushings

[Svevan]

The guys at Penny Arcade (and probably most gamers) find that kind of marketing pretty weak.

I think there should be more videogames based on literature; games are kinda in that "total cinema" mode that Bazin railed against. Adaptations are looked down upon because they're mostly adaptations from movies and almost always bad. Unfortunately, in the case of Dante's Inferno, things didn't go so well.

[colinr0380]

Yes, it is a rather high brow reference for a game that is basically a God of War clone.

[dx23]

It gets worse- there's one for Romeo and Juliet in the same style, which contains both the play and a novelization. Of Romeo and Juliet.

I just don't even know.

Oh my God!

[swo17]

That's all well and good, but where did they rank on Edward and Bella's favorite books list???

By the way, a source

Spoiler

my wife

informs me that Edward was not actually a fan of Wuthering Heights when it first came out, as he found it mostly cheesy and its theme of undying love did not resonate with him. But fast forward to the present, Bella is reading it like all the time and so Edward is forced to reevaluate his opinion on it, and like his love for Bella, he finds that his love for Bronte now also has no end. Or something like that.

[dx23]

That's all well and good, but where did they rank on Edward and Bella's favorite books list???

By the way, a source

Spoiler

my wife

informs me that Edward was not actually a fan of Wuthering Heights when it first came out, as he found it mostly cheesy and its theme of undying love did not resonate with him. But fast forward to the present, Bella is reading it like all the time and so Edward is forced to reevaluate his opinion on it, and like his love for Bella, he finds that his love for Bronte now also has no end. Or something like that.

Don't use your wife as shield. We know you are a die hard Twilight fan.

[domino harvey]

Twihard

[HistoryProf]

I just threw up in my mouth. and not a little bit.

[Matt]

[dx23]

I knew you would embrace smilies sooner or later.

[domino harvey]

[Perkins Cobb]

Hmph. I believe I asked for that smiley in the Broadcast News thread, and you didn't hook a brotha up.

[manicsounds]

I'm sorry. Who are Bella and Edward?

[Murdoch]

I like how you can immediately tell that whoever decided on those taglines has never read either of them.

[dx23]

[Svevan]

Oh God, I remember seeing Lost Treasure of Atlantis on TV when I was a kid. The mythical element was the pull for me, less so MacGyver. Somehow even the Atlantans had rigged their temple to explode, but instead of the requisite digital readout counting down to destruction, the explosion was primed to occur at the precise moment of the alignment of the planets. It was pretty sweet. When I was 12.

Also, either MacGruber is a great spoof, or the MacGyver guys just gave up and said "Make it look like MacGruber."

[matrixschmatrix]

I don't think that cover's bad at all- it perfectly represents the content you will find within. Hair, explosions, and a shoddy job of putting them together.

[King of Kong]

I noticed that "Twilit" Pride and Prejudice cover this past weekend. Text-book false advertising. Indeed, in her work Austen often took to task Gothic novels for giving young female readers false impressions of "romantic" love. I wonder what she would have made of the Twilight franchise?

[Fierias]

the image itself is lazy, kitschy, and ugly, but my huge problem with this cover is the italicized 'Never,' which forces me to internally read the title with this douche-y, ironic voice that goes against the brooding, cynical tone that I usually associate with the title. I want to trip whoever decided to write it that way.

[MyNameCriterionForum]

Still better than the CC White Dog artwork, grrr

[Feego]