'Rediculous' Customer & Critic Reviews

[eerik]

PowerDVD sucks because it does not let you mess up the aspect ratio:

One thing that made me almost go for it was it promised the ability to stretch the video. If I put a BluRay on my player and TV I can zoom and get it to fit the screen. Even on a 1.33 to 1 video that is not anamorphic. This program offers NO ZOOM. NO CROP NO alternative but to watch a video that looks like Lincoln's Stove Pipe Hat Ratio! Example: Poirot. I love the show. I bought a hundred dollar (no give or take) set. I get the Lincoln Effect on version 12 and this version.

[karmajuice]

(It's real)

Some friends and I discovered this a while back and spent several hours discussing what one might do with such an enormous quantity of lube. I don't remember most of our ideas, but I do recall that the slip-and-slide possibilities somehow led to us developing a concept for an educational theme park based around the inside of the human body, with the different sections of the park corresponding to systems of the body: circulatory (a giant, hydraulic, pulsating heart kids can climb through; a lazy river water ride with red blood cell rafts), nervous (very high-tech and flashy, super fast rides), etc. All fun and games until you get to the reproductive and digestive parks, which would be either nightmarish or nauseating.

[Michael Kerpan]

Actual product page for the above: http://www.passionlubes.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[domino harvey]

The story is as exciting as Stephen Hawking delivering the State of the Union address and, as an added bonus, the scenes go from bad to worse faster than a donkey eating a waffle.

[bamwc2]

There's something extremely lazy about putting Harry Knowles quotes in here, but when he's pervin' out on The House on Sorority Row it's kind of hard to resist:

If you like 80’s T&A Sorority massacre movies – you really can’t go wrong with THE HOUSE ON SORORITY ROW. There’s not a ton of nudity, but what is there is NICE.

As a lonely thirteen year old boy I would have deeply appreciated this review. Now when I think about it coming from a man-child in his forties it's just a bit creepy.

[domino harvey]

The only thing foreign films are good for is copious T&A. We used to have it in our movies before they all became PG-13 cartoons. Now if you want nudity you have to subscribe to cable and watch the TV shows.

[tenia]

The only thing foreign films are good for is copious T&A. We used to have it in our movies before they all became PG-13 cartoons. Now if you want nudity you have to subscribe to cable and watch the TV shows.

Whose fault is it ?

[sir_luke]

I've been finding some great gems in Gary's DVDBeaver reviews, but this one, in his review of For All Mankind, struck me as particularly amusing:
"This isn't La Grande Illusion but it definitely is worthy of a place in the Criterion collection."
It reminds me of an assignment I had in my freshman Literature and Film class. We were asked to write an essay comparing and contrasting All Quiet on the Western Front and Fried Green Tomatoes.

[domino harvey]

If you liked AU HASARD BALTHAZAR by Robert Bresson, you will also enjoy MIGHTY JOE YOUNG the remake.

His full review is effusive but serious, BTW

[The Narrator Returns]

I dare you to try and guess which film this review is talking about;

this is a movie by close encounters dudde
dont get me started on the murder/fun at the start
why are people so well spoken
phatic happen

[domino harvey]

I guessed Amistad and then Google told me otherwise

[domino harvey]

Not a review, but someone posted this fabulously unappealing CL ad on DVDTalk:

Selling off my ENTIRE collection. Priced to sell fastly! There are BETWEEN 300-325 DVD's in this collection. Price comes to LESS than $2.00 a piece. DO the MATH! And you will see I'm RIGHT!

Will NOT separate. No you can not come to my home and "cherry pick" through them. We have two very young children here and will not have that going on. Priced to sell fastly. Price is negotiable but will not accept low ball offers. NO trades. No favors. Do not ask to come to my house and bring candy to give to my children. It WON'T happen. Will not sell individual items. WHOLE lot only. Do NOT come into my house with the notion of not purchasing this collection, if you WALK IN my house, it's considered SOLD! Do NOT look into the direction of my two small children at any point of the purchasing and removal time. Please do not ask for a list of titles. I do not have time to sit here and list them ALL because as stated, two young children here that take up most of our time and attention. And NO, the book shelf does not come with it, like I said I have small children and I don't need you picking that thing up and swinging it and hurting my two young children. Not TODAY and Not Tomorrow. Not EVER!!! Do NOT email me with silly ridiculous low offers, because not only is it insulting to me, ITS also insulting to my two small children who I take care of 24/7. Will remove when sold.

[The Narrator Returns]

[Movie-Brat]

There's something extremely lazy about putting Harry Knowles quotes in here, but when he's pervin' out on The House on Sorority Row it's kind of hard to resist:

If you like 80’s T&A Sorority massacre movies – you really can’t go wrong with THE HOUSE ON SORORITY ROW. There’s not a ton of nudity, but what is there is NICE.

As a lonely thirteen year old boy I would have deeply appreciated this review. Now when I think about it coming from a man-child in his forties it's just a bit creepy.

The only thing foreign films are good for is copious T&A. We used to have it in our movies before they all became PG-13 cartoons. Now if you want nudity you have to subscribe to cable and watch the TV shows.

Ha, tell me about it. I've heard dozens amount of people especially on Blu-Ray.com who were unhappy with the US threatical cut of Swamp Thing being used for Shout Factory's Blu-Ray release despite the fact that one, that is Wes Craven's preferred cut. Two, I believe he was never happy with the international cut because of the gratuitous nudity inserted in.

[Mathew2468]

Review of Sternwood Academy Finishing School - Spanking DVD (2012) (NSFW cover btw)

Strong and Delightful Spanking of Naked Female Butts

"I liked the view of the gorgeous butts of a number of young woman, seen several at a time. Heavily British in orientation. I would have preferred nudity in the photos (or at least breasts showing) for the spanking instead of just photos of the butts. One female butt, which was most often in view, was much less attractive than the others. However, I was pleased enough so that I will watch this DVD again."

[Zot!]

From Wikipedia:

Box office
Even though the movie did not make as much profit as expected, the crew all agreed it was a movie to remember.

[Michael Kerpan]

Review of Sternwood Academy Finishing School - Spanking DVD (2012) (NSFW cover btw)

Strong and Delightful Spanking of Naked Female Butts

"I liked the view of the gorgeous butts of a number of young woman, seen several at a time. Heavily British in orientation. I would have preferred nudity in the photos (or at least breasts showing) for the spanking instead of just photos of the butts. One female butt, which was most often in view, was much less attractive than the others. However, I was pleased enough so that I will watch this DVD again."

and this comment (by someone under the name of "johnson":

this spanking dvd is very good some lovely girls and great spanking gong on i ussualy by spanking dvds from sextoyshopit.co.uk ,or simplydvd ,but these ones on amazon are very good i would recommened if you like a bit of spanking.

[bamwc2]

From Wikipedia:

Box office
Even though the movie did not make as much profit as expected, the crew all agreed it was a movie to remember.

Zot!, please tell me that that's in reference to the film immediately above your post!

[MichaelB]

Review of Sternwood Academy Finishing School - Spanking DVD (2012) (NSFW cover btw)

Strong and Delightful Spanking of Naked Female Butts

"I liked the view of the gorgeous butts of a number of young woman, seen several at a time. Heavily British in orientation. I would have preferred nudity in the photos (or at least breasts showing) for the spanking instead of just photos of the butts. One female butt, which was most often in view, was much less attractive than the others. However, I was pleased enough so that I will watch this DVD again."

and this comment (by someone under the name of "johnson":

this spanking dvd is very good some lovely girls and great spanking gong on i ussualy by spanking dvds from sextoyshopit.co.uk ,or simplydvd ,but these ones on amazon are very good i would recommened if you like a bit of spanking.

However, 'ohsheamom' was apparently "Not Impressed":

it was ok, just spanking nothing more.
was hoping for a bit extra but lesson learned.
wont be buying any more volumes

Caveat emptor.

[bamwc2]

and this comment (by someone under the name of "johnson":

this spanking dvd is very good some lovely girls and great spanking gong on i ussualy by spanking dvds from sextoyshopit.co.uk ,or simplydvd ,but these ones on amazon are very good i would recommened if you like a bit of spanking.

However, 'ohsheamom' was apparently "Not Impressed":

it was ok, just spanking nothing more.
was hoping for a bit extra but lesson learned.
wont be buying any more volumes

Caveat emptor.

But how could that be when it promises "Bare Hands, Paddles, and Straps"...AND STRAPS!

[Zot!]

From Wikipedia:

Box office
Even though the movie did not make as much profit as expected, the crew all agreed it was a movie to remember.

Zot!, please tell me that that's in reference to the film immediately above your post!

No, but I might prefer corporal punishment to Kissing a Fool.

[zedz]

Not a review, but nevertheless rediculous. For that price I could buy the real Maggie Smith.

[swo17]

Lots of great deals if you peruse through that seller's storefront. Like the Brother Bear Blu-ray for only £123.00--a relative bargain!

[Drucker]

Jeez you'd think with all that money they saved by not including a "D" in their store name, they could pass along some savings to consumers.

[bamwc2]

From John Nolte's ideologically pure review of Blazing Saddles:

I've said this before but it bears repeating. If the Left does end up amassing all the power they seek, you can count on Bureau of Land management SWAT teams being sent out to confiscate material like "Blazing Saddles." So you might want to buy a back-up copy.